20060227

Fyodor Mikhaylovich Dostoyevsky


So much has happened lately that I have been extremely assistant to write on this a'here blog, but I feel as if I may be able to hit a few of the highlights with some sort of accuracy, so here goes. Last friday my Uncle Mike and Aunt Sandi were in a nearby town (queenstown) for the day, so I hopped in my little brown car and tooled over and caught up with them in the mid-morn. They had obviously been hatching some serious plans for the day, so we got right down to it and hit the local water, Lake Wakatipu, with a two-hour ride on a 1912 Vintage Steamship named,"the TSS Earnslaw". From the old steamship we got a pretty good view of the surrounding mountains and lake. It was a glorious day outside and the peaks were shimmering with fresh sunlight, so I spent much of the ride talking with Uncle Mike and Aunt Sandi while gazing out at the scenery. After the ship ride we hit the local gondola for a trip up to a peak that conveniently has a cafeteria style restaurant on it. Man, this is where the tourists go! We had some good grub and then shot the breeze a bit whilst enjoying the view. After the gondola ride down the real action came. Uncle Mike and I took a jet-boat ride up the Shotover river. Cruising up a river at incredible speeds while dodging rocks whilst hoping that the dude driving the boat doesn't have a brain-fart had my heart racing, for sure. The dude driving the boat does this crazy 360's in the boat and it is pretty hard to remain seated while he is pulling off these tricks. My uncle mike lifted out of his seat due to gravitational forces during one of these stunts and my immediate thought was "DANGER!"....Fortunately he re-seated and composed himself with very little trouble.

Today was a pretty good day at work due to an in-flux of new employees and some serious sunshine. I spent the morning chatting with a new German girl while in the afternoon I spoke at length with three dudes from Argentina. I've decided that I must one day learn spanish.

Last saturday some friends and I went to an outdoor reggae festival at a nearby winery. There were about 4,000 people there and most of them were drunk on wine and sun-burnt. The main-act "fat freddy's drop" was pretty solid and they definitely got everyone there in a good chilled-out state of mind. My friend Byron forced me to climb up on his shoulders during the show just as a joke, and unfortunately he dropped me and my spectacles got bent out of shape, so now my glass have tape on them.

Hand cramping. goodbye

20060226

Aha Shake Heartbreak


It's rainy and gross here today and for some reason I can't find the motivation needed to really update the blog properly, so, as a sort of treat, I have put up a picture of myself! click on it to make it life-size.

20060222

South No North


It's thursday and I'll be damned if my legs aren't still sore from the hike I took on Sunday. Jeez, I have got to mold this massive blob of flesh I call "my body" into something resembling the human form (with huge muscles, of course). The hike was absolutely spectacular. It was one of those unbelievable days when the natural beauty of Earth leaves incredible imprints on your mind. All week long I've been waltzing through life living off the memory of this past weekend's high-alpine adventure. The hike, which I did by my lonesome, took approximately 9 hours. The climb up to the saddle was some real hardcore vertical business. I'd stop at one hiking post, look up the mountain, cry, and try to convince myself that the top was just right above me out of sight. Once I reached the actual saddle I fooled around with the camera a bit and then napped in the sunshine. I took some pretty spectacular photos from the top that look nearly like paintings. Off to my left was a glacier, directly in front of me was Mt. Aspiring covered in snow, and off to my right lay the valley I had hiked up through containing a slow meandering river with light blue water. The hike down nearly wrecked me. I was dragging my feet for the last two hours. Upon arriving at my car I collapsed and immediately began stretching in hopes of avoiding sore everything.
Tomorrow I am meeting my Uncle Mike and Aunt Sandi in a nearby town called, "queenstown". It's just by chance that they happen to be vacationing in NZ while I am here and it seems like a great and rare opportunity to catch up with them. I'm not sure what we'll get up to but "queenstown" is chock full of all sorts of touristy things, so I imagine we won't have to look far for some form of enjoyment.
Last night I went to a local Indian restaurant and gorged myself on rice and whatever other dish happened to be in front of me. Some dudes that were at the dinner ordered a ridiculous amount of wine so I did more than my fare share of sipping. unfortunately the bill at the end of the meal was a little steep due to the excess wine. When the shock from the bill sunk in I suggested the old "hog and jog", but that didn't go over too well with the others. After the meal I complained that I had been given the "Dheli Belly"....whatever that means.

20060217

I Haven't Been Myself of Late


Today is saturday and I am relaxing with plans to go swimming and drink coffee. Tomorrow I plan on going all out with an extended strenuous hike in nearby MT. Aspiring National Park. I will be hiking to one of the most highly praised saddles in new zealand. This spot, Cascade Saddle, is apparently unreal in clear conditions and I can only hope that the weather holds out until the morrow. It'll probably take around 8 hours round trip to do the hike, but I am up for the exercise and everything will be dramatically easier due to the light-weight day-pack I'll be using. I'm pretty excited to get back out into nature. I did a pretty big hike last weekend, but that seems like ages ago and now I am itching to get my fix once again. I'm going alone, so it is bound to be a different sort of outdoors experience than last weekend.
All else is good here in Wanaka. My flat-mate and I have come to an understanding and now I sort of feel like an asshole for holding such deep grievances against him over a sandwich. It's true, however, that the sandwich incident was just the tip of the ice-berg and I had been close to boiling over for quite some time, so I shouldn't feel bad, I suppose. Anyway, I'm not holding any grudges against the poor fellow and I imagine that from here on out things will be easier. Yep, the problem has been solved!

Eyes Aiming for Ashes


Oh Goodness!
Today at work I stewed and pouted and cursed and looked generally displeased for 90% of the day. Why did I act like this one might ask? This morning when I awoke at 6;30 in the morning to prepare for my day at the vineyard I was greeted by a disheartening surprise. Upon opening the refrigerator door I noticed that the plate which contained my pre-made lunch for the day was stark white empty and where my sandwiches once rested sat a note. In a scrawled midnight handwriting I saw, "Oppps! Thanks You! I.O.U. -Paul. Dreadful demonic images of revenge immediately popped before my eyes. Curses crossed my lips without the slightest notice of what was said. Should I throw a bucket of water on him while he is soundly sleeping? Should I arouse him and demand a new batch of sandwiches, similar to the first, be made? I took my coffee, ate my porridge, and let my jets cool for a moment. I chose no action. I will not lower myself to his level and allow him to receive the attention he so eagerly wants, I reasoned. Today after work I composed myself and sat in the living room awaiting his arrival home. He entered through the door and I pointed at him. He strode into the living room with a goofy-ass shit-eating grin plastered on his sloppy mug. "Do you remember that speech you gave me weeks ago about mutual respect?," I asked. No Answer. "Well, I'd like to point out that eating my lunch, which you knew I made on the last evening, does not fall into the category of respect, in my humble opinion". Surprisingly enough he agreed and seemed to realize his fault. I emphasized that that sort of garbage will not stand. He again empathetically apologized and assured me his motive for eating the sandwiches was not out of malice, but just out of sheer foolishness. Well, I was partially satisfied with the outcome of the meeting and I will let it sit for now. I can't believe a 38 year old man doesn't know better. Shame on him!, don't you agree? --Collin

20060212

The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others.


Man-
Today was a long day on the old vineyard- I'll tell you why. I worked all day long with the same person and unfortunately he is the only person on my work team whom I don't consider "awesome". Anyway, his name is Dave and he is 18 years old, he lies, and he is dating the boss's daughter, she is 14. Today I learned that dave beat up 7 guys at once, and they had bats! I also learned that Dave likes to jump off a 200 foot high cliff into the river everyday after work, he says it doesn't hurt. It's odd to hear someone lie to you straight faced. I wasn't sure what to say to him after he told me he beat up 7 guys at once. What do you say? "Ya don't say!... 7 guys, Jeeez!...I've only done 5."
Also, my friend Byron moved into my flat yesterday so now the house seems a bit more balanced. He'll only be living there for two weeks, but it'll be nice to have a compadre about.
Today I went swimming after work in a nearby river and I saw first-hand what an introduced algae had done to the river ecosystem here in new zealand. Apparently this stuff, called, "didymo", is choking up the rivers here in new zealand after only being introduced from somewhere around north America last year. Big globs of the stuff were floating all about in the river. GROSS! BARF ME OUT! GAG ME WITH A SPOON! check it out http://www.biosecurity.govt.nz/pests-diseases/plants/didymo/

20060211

And now....you are going to dance...like you've never danced before!


Howdy Folks. I've been settling into the life of a "working man" here in Wanaka quite easily. My flatmate and I have been getting along pretty well and I am really digging the feeling of having a room all to my own, even if it is just a mattress on the floor with no furnishings whatsoever. Work at the vineyard has been great due to the relaxed atmosphere and cool co-workers. I feel as if I am finally becoming immersed in the culture and lifestyle of the Kiwis. Many of my friends are locals and it's nice to get off the back-packer's circuit and actually feel as if you are living some where
Yesterday a few friends and I did a fairly massive day-hike on a track known as "the routeburn". We hiked approximately 20 miles in 7 hours. It was an exhausting day, but the scenery and the challenge made it all the more memorable. I thought my legs were going to be jello today, but I feel surprisingly good - perhaps I am not the blob of fat I thought I was! I hope to do some more long day-hikes over the next few weeks.
I set aside some time tonight to watch one of my favorite movies, I haven't seen a good movie in a long time. I am watching a german film called, "fitzcarraldo".
goodbye for now

20060205

No More Crumbs For This American.



Yowza. This last week and a half has been B-U-S-Y. I put in a 60 hour week between working as a "viticulturist" at the vineyard and washing dishes like a little piggy at the cafe. I tried to mentally psyche myself up to work 7 days a week, but alas after doing it for a bit I have decided that I can't hack it and I quit the dish-pig job. The boss at the cafe is a jovial fellow named "paul". Whenever Paul makes a somewhat comedic remark to me he winks when he does it. He has an incredibly thick and quick kiwi accent and in combination with my failing hearing

I constantly find myself saying "what's that?", or "come again?. Sometimes, out of embarrassment, I pretend that I understood what he said when in actuality I didn't catch a word.
Each day he makes me a pretty good lunch for my mid-day break. I have the pick of the entire menu and most of the stuff is pretty good-looking and pricey. He asked me what I wanted my first day and I told him that I was a vegetarian so my options may be slightly limited. He squealed, "what!, you're a vego!?"..."aw come on, you can't be a vego, you're a bloke!". I assured him that it was true, I am both a vegetarian and a bloke. "oh, can't be", he went on, "you're just caught up in the little fad like the rest of 'em"...."you'll be back to the beef before you know it!" Paul was a little sore when I told him I was quitting the job.

Just last week I finally found a room to rent while living here in Wanaka. The house is in a great location and is quite nice. My room-mate and landlord, Paul, is a 38 year-old Kiwi who practices Law here in Wanaka. He drives a little scooter around town while wearing a business suit. He drinks wine and tells me all about the complexities of it. His brother owns a coffee company and he has an expensive coffee machine in the house (it cost $3000, he told me that, he tells me how much everything costs) that I make espresso with every morning. Before moving into the house he gave me a little speech about how to keep things clean around the abode. He came across as a wee bit anal-retentive, so over the last week I have been keeping an extra close eye on my level of cleanliness. I feel as if it is an extreme challenge to keep the house up to his standards. I find myself constantly cleaning minute crumbs that would be entirely insignificant in any other household. Last night I took the time to do the dishes even thought none of the dishes belonged to me. He saw me doing the dishes and in passing said "good job". An hour or so later he passed me in the hall and again told me "good job". Now that I think about it I am pretty sure that he is playing some sort of sick mind game to see how much work he can get the new room-mate to do. Well, I am onto to his little head game and from here on out I am reverting back to my old slovenly ways. No more crumbs for this American.

Ciao! Chow.